I think I came up with a solution that fits everyone's desire. I think you should be able to customize PvP rules and thea matching system will find someone with the same rule setting as you. These are just a few ideas I came up with.
If you really wanted to make it fun you could add more such as put a limit on pips or make it to where you must use at least so many pips.
Cannot cast spells above (4/5/6/7/8/No limit) pips. Must cast spells at least (1/2/3/4/5) pip(s). Block Rank X spells (Yes/No)
Also there could be a "Standard" option for those fine with PvP as it is. This way people who are fine with PvP don't have to put up with complainers and those who complain would had no reason to complain since they can customize their match to find someone with the same set of rules.